The Dark Knight

It is so refreshing to see the legend of Batman being given the respect it deserves because The Dark Knight has surpassed and transcended simply being called a ’superhero’ film. There’s a whole lot more on offer here than just plain ole super-heroics. What we have here is a stellar cast delivering real and poignant acting roles that make each and every unbelievable character - believable.

Heath Ledger pulls in a stunning performance - turning the Joker into a maniacal, psychopathic, anarchist - tinged with ‘Clockwork Orange’ inspired merciless, senseless brutality and schism. You simply cannot take your eyes of him as he possesses the screen and steals each and every scene he is in. There are some genuinely frightful moments accompanied by Hitchcock-like music soundscapes as the Joker proceeds to tell the story of his ’scars’ to his victims. This is evil incarnate. Pure evil. Ledger flinches and stutters as if a sadistic lost, insane soul has completely taken him over, spitting out his lines with venom, satirical, sarcastic jest. What a final curtain call for this talented young man. Take a bow Mr. Ledger.

The Joker appears in the film with a stunning opening bank robbery that is ingenious in its execution and methodology. There is no back-story for the Joker. There is no origin. The Joker exists as the other side of the Batman coin. Where the caped-crusader is a symbol of justice the Joker represents chaos in its purest form.

But there are always three sides to every story. Enter Harvey Dent. Gotham City’s ‘white knight’ District Attorney who finds himself in the middle of the Batman V Joker struggle. Comic book fans will know all about Harvey Dent and his role in the Batman universe, so I won’t spoil it here for others.

The Dark Knight is one of the most amazing movie-going experiences I have seen in a long, long time and already - I want to see this one again. The bar has been raised…

King of Kong

From the opening blips and squeaks spewing forth from the retro game machines to your first viewing of the movie’s villain Billy Mitchell and his ego-maniacal delusions of grandeur - the first words that will come to mind are… “Are these people for real?” ‘King of Kong’ is the true story (honest!) of the battle to attain the world-record Donkey Kong high-score. You heard right. There’s people out there who really, really care about this stuff to the point where absolutely nothing else matters. God damn, we are witnessing the decline of Western Civilization before our very eyes and boy is it funny!

So what’s it all about then? Well, back in the 80’s, the aforementioned Billy Mitchell - who looks like a cross between Kenny Loggins and Nick Cave had set the world-record score for Donkey Kong. This record remained uncontested for years and years but in 2006 the film’s hero Steve Weibe breaks the high-score but his submission is denied by the official gaming commission (yeah, you read that right!) because Weibe racked up the points on a home based console. The only way the score can stand is that if it is completed inside a ‘Funland’ location. Yet, they commission quite easily accepts Mitchell’s video-taped record.

And this is where the lunacy really kicks off where we see a middle-school science teacher (Weibe) and a hot sauce mogul and (Mitchell) vie for the Guinness World Record on the arcade classic, Donkey Kong.

Insane! Stupid! Moronic! But friggn hilarious at the same time! This is… the doco of the year! No contest!

Inland Empire

I love David Lynch. Unashamedly. I love his eccentricity, his symbolism, his outright geeky quirkiness. I love his films. The ambience he creates. The music… ah the music! Heck, I’m a fan. Have been for a long, long time so it was with great anticipation that I wanted to catch his latest offering ‘Inland Empire’ on the big screen. And what better theatre to see it at than the classic Astor?

Where did it all go so horribly wrong? We were there for close to four hours (intermission and a dud projector) - let alone loud, yawning hecklers which made the whole experience tinged with more inspired David Lynch moments off the screen rather than on.

I’m sorry to say, I found ‘Inland Empire’ to be an arduous movie experience. I hated it. With a passion. Boring. Mundane. Tedious. Devoid of any fuckn edits whatsoever. A gratuitous, self-indulgent wank.

And there’s that question of four hours of my life, that I will never, ever get back. I’ll have to remember that when I am on my deathbed…

This Is England

This Is England’ is one of the most amazing movie experiences you are likely to see all year. Set in Thatcher’s England with the country at war in the Falkland Islands, the dreary desolation and despair of midlands, England permeates throughout the film. Young and naive Shaun (magnificently played by newcomer Thomas Turgoose) - is 12 years old and mourning the death of his father killed in the Falkland war. He seeks friendship and an end to the bullying he receives at school. so he finds solace with the local skinheads. They quickly take him under their wing and introduce him to the world of Doc Martens, suspenders and obligatory crew-cut! At this point in time, the film cruises along with tinges of genuine humor and innocence, but the life of Shaun changes drastically when the volatile and incendiary Combo (Snatch star - Stephen Graham) is released from prison. The mood and frivolity takes a backseat to the underlying sinister tones of violence and mayhem that Combo has now brought to the lives of these ‘fun’ skinheads. Each and every scene with Combo is laced with an ominous undertone. He is so viciously aggressive and head-strong in his misguided views of racism and nationalism. You literally view the innocence of young Shaun stripped away from him piece by piece.

An incredibly confrontational and stark film that has to be seen by all and sundry. Movie of the year folks!

Die Hard 4

With a much-needed day off from work, I decided to go and see the opening of ‘Die Hard 4?. Corrr! It rocked! Sure the plot is totally unbelievable (you know, cyber-criminals who can hack this, that and everything at the speed of light) but who friggn cares when you got cars, choppers, bridges, people, and jet-fighters been blown to itsy, bitsy smithereens in pure, unadulterated violence and mayhem! Could this be the greatest action movie of all time? Could it just! It looks slick! It sounds like you’re in the middle of Baghdad and you’ve got Bruce Willis at his best stony-faced self as a one-man-army against the forces of evil. Magnificently played by Deadwood’s Timothy Olyphant and he does the bad-guy/sunnavabitch role with aplomb coolness and malevolent ease! The hacker-wonderboy role is played by Justin Long (who us Mac zealots will know as the “I’m a Mac” guy in the Apple ads). Great cameo by Kevin Smith who has the nerdiest and geekiest room I have ever seen! Go see this one folks. It has to be experienced on a big screen with big sound and an even bigger serving of pop-corn and coke! FUN!

Borat

The one sad aspect about Sacha Baron Cohen’s character Borat, is that now with his new found popularity and celebrity - every knows who and what he is which in effect - kills the character from any future misadventures. Spawned from a character from the hit UK comedy show “Da Ali-G Show”, Borat was always my fave from that show so it was with great anticipation that I waited to see this flick. The publicity campaign for the movie has been a resounding success with the movie generating millions on its opening weekend worldwide due to a meticulous promotional campaign that hyped this movie to fever pitch. I was curious to see how Cohen would translate his Borat creation onto the big screen as his previous cinema effort based on his Ali G persona was a diabolical disaster. Having been a big fan of the Ali G show (both UK and HBO versions) - I was counting down the days till I got to see this film. The movie’s vignettes are intertwined with a storyline of Borat heading to the USA to record a documentary. Seeing Borat interact with rednecks, Christian loonies, and upper class snobs who actually believe he is a foreign reporter - is damn funny. Cohen’s ability to go with the flow and create interesting and often ridiculous premises’ that his unsuspecting victims swallow hook, line and sinker is comedically brilliant. It’s all as lowbrow as you can get and there are some disturbing scenes featuring male nudity(!) that one will find hard to forget. It’s a fun flick and if you enjoy it - do check out some of the Ali G DVD’s as some of the material presented there is a little stronger than what is ultimately featured in the movie.

Jackass Number Two

Having grown up on the Three Stooges and Warner Bros cartoons for most of my childhood and (ahem) adult life - I can truly appreciate the slapstick lowbrow humour of the Jackass crew. In fact, a few buddies of mine have even dabbled in some stunts and committed them to film… remind me to show you the video of 3 thirty-somethings and a shopping-trolley stunt of a few years ago. But I digress. The first Jackass movie was easily one of the funnest times I have ever had at a movie. Ever. My two buddies and I, planted our butts in the comfy seats of our local cinema-complex, stuffed our faces with over-salted pop-corn and laughed and laughed and laughed from the minute the opening titles hit, till the end credits. Best money I had ever spent at a flick. The only disappointing aspect of the first movie was that it seemed to mark an end to the Jackass franchise. The TV show wrapped up and spawned a number of spin-off shows - (Wild Boyz, Viva La Bam et al) and some copycats from across the pond (Dirty Sanchez, The Dudesons). When word filtered out that the crew would be back together for a new flick, you wouldn’t believe the amount of excitement that generated amongst my pals. How in God’s name would they ever top the first movie? There was some pretty extreme shenanigans in Jackass 1 and when all is said and done, the exploits and craziness of Number 2 totally surpass it all. I mean, glamour boy Bam Margera is reduced to tears in this flick… several times. Jackass Number 2 is fun. I left the theater exhausted and with a grin streched from ear-to-ear wondering when could I make the time to see it all again!

Nacho Libre

Let’s face it, Jack Black is a damn funny guy. He has the uncanny ability to make one laugh quite easily whether he be crooning out one of his tirades in the form of a tenacious ‘deedle-diddle-dee deedle-diddle-doo’ rock song - or by simply looking direct into the
camera and twitching his eyebrow. He’s a riot! So you’d think that Black’s collaboration with two of the creators of cult classic ‘Napoleon Dynamite’ (Jared & Jaruda Hess) and the writer of ‘School of Rock’ (Mike White) would generate a hit comedy movie in ‘Nacho Libre’. Not so. I was left feeling bitterly disappointed and wondering just where ‘Nacho Libre’ ultimately fails. In places, it tries too hard to be like ‘Napoleon Dynamite’ but unlike ‘Napoleon’s’ morose absurdity and slow pacing which works well in its dry and subtle humor - it all goes horribly wrong in ‘Nacho Libre’. In places, it is embarrassingly stupid and not even a fart joke can save it. I feel ripped off in forking out a fortune for the import copy of this DVD but I had been so eagerly awaiting this movie from the moment the (awesome) trailer was doing the rounds earlier in the year. There are some genuinely funny moments and on a production level, the film looks absolutely stunning in its color and tone but that is just not enough to save it. Bummer!

The Departed

It’s not very often that the opening of a movie gets me that excited that I just have to see it on its debut day. All the buzz for Scorsese’s ‘The Departed’ has been overwhelmingly positive with grandiose comparisions to his 1991 classic ‘Goodfellas’. Like the aforementioned ‘Goodfellas’, ‘The Departed’ chugs along at a blistering pace with vintage Scorcese direction and some damn fine cinematography setting the pace for this brutal crime drama. With an outstanding cast at his disposal (Jack Nicholson, Matt Damon, Leonardo DiCaprio et al), Scorcese brings forth a tale of contemporary crime fiction that will leave you spellbound and transfixed to the screen. Starring is Matt Damon as Colin, a Massachusetts Police officer with a hidden agenda. He’s a rat, working for Boston’s top gangster Frank Costello (Jack Nicholson). Colin’s a worker and he rises through the State Police ranks rapidly, tipping off Costello at every stop along the way. But there’s a problem. He’s not the only rat in the picture. The Cops have their own mole, an undercover officer working deep inside Costello’s organization. His name is William Costigan, (Leonardo DiCaprio). It’s not long before everyone figures out they’ve been compromised, and the shit hits the fan as both rats on either side of the law scramble to find and take out each other. Rivetting!

Superman Returns

I was never a huge fan of the Superman comics, but in my time, I have read a fair share of them. The last Superman title(s) I did read were back in the early 90’s when DC decided to kill off the Man of Steel and have him reincarnate as 5 seperate entities. (Get it? Five Supermen equals five times the comic sales!) Well, that was the train of thought back in the 90’s when the major comic book companies (DC & Marvel) literally lost the plot. The entire industry became more about gimmicks and quick sales whilst the storylines became farcical and ridiculous. But I digress. Out of all the prior Supes’ movies, this is clearly the darkest in theme. In fact, the overall tone of the flick is rather moody and brooding. With Superman ‘missing’ for close to five years, (he is on a quest to find the remnants of his home planet Krypton) the rest of Metropolis has gone on with their lives. Including former flame, Lois Lane. Lois is now married with child and the mythos of Superman is almost all but eroded. Lois has even won a Pulitzer Prize for her work ‘Why The World Doesn’t Need Superman’. Bryan Singer’s Superman isn’t so much a remake of the 70’s classic but a re-telling of the tale and that, for this viewer, was completely refreshing and pleasing to see. I walked into the theatre expecting a blow-by-blow remake but was surprised to see this alternate take on the Superman mythos. The movie also features a very interesting twist about half-way through, that blew me away - I won’t spoil it for everyone. Visually, the film looks amazing! Some of the special effects will have you picking up your jaw from the floor. Superman in flight is vastly impressive and out-worldly! Brandon Routh is an imposing figure as the Man of Steel and handles the role with ease and class. I had a grin from ear to ear at film’s conclusion and that’s what it’s all about. Thoroughly enjoying and a ton of fun. Super? Nah! SUPERB!

Omen 666

With a massive marketing campaign and a - somewhat - biblical date to release the movie, 6/6/06, the remake of ‘The Omen’ - renamed ‘Omen 666′ opened in cinemas worldwide today. The girlfriend and I had decided long ago that we wanted to see this movie on this unholiest of days (heh!) so off we trekked to our local multiplex for a date with the Devil. Well, his offspring at least. I vividly remember the original flick which I haven’t seen in quite a long time and enjoying it immensely. An incredibly sinister and moody slab of film that has stood the test of time so well - that a remake was really not necessary at all. I mean, what next, a remake of ‘The Exorcist’? The original Omen was such a successful movie because its basic premise is lifted straight from the Christian Bible. Christianity’s main weapon of choice has always been fear. Keep the masses fearful of ole Beelzebub and the coffers at the local church will always be plentiful. Back in 1976, fear also filled the movie theaters! But the times, they sure as hell have changed. The new Damian (Seamus Davey Fitzpatrick) looked more like ‘Problem Child’ rather than the spawn of the Devil. With his goofy menacing stare in various scenes throughout the movie, the audience were giggling at every opportune moment. Probably not the desired result the filmmakers were after. There really was no reason to remake this horror classic. No reason at all but to cash in on all the hoopla of today’s date. ‘Omen 666′ has some genuinely hair-raising moments throughout, it is magnificently shot and crafted and a great performance by Mia Farrow who we all remember giving birth to the son of Satan in the classic ‘Rosemary’s Baby’. Creative casting or is Farrow that desperate for a role these days? But this remake just cannot even compare to the original in terms of cast and brooding overtones. The one good thing to come out of it however, was a much needed desire by yours truly to purchase the original version’s DVD.

X-Men III: The Last Stand

Having been a huge fan of the X-Men (movies & comics) I was very much looking forward to the 3rd installment in the franchise ‘X-Men III: The Last Stand’. With usual X-Director Bryan Singer off doing ‘Superman Returns’, directorial duties were handed over to the oft maligned Brett Ratner. Reason enough for some fans to castigate the movie even before they had seen it. Go figure! In this third flick a cure for mutancy threatens to alter the course of history. For the first time, mutants have a choice: retain their uniqueness, though it isolates and alienates them, or give up their powers and become human. With the return of Jean Grey, who was thought dead at the conclusion of the second movie, as the Dark Phoenix (a veritable Angel of Death) - the movie takes a dark and sinister tone. Whilst director Singer spent time and focus to concentrate deeply into many of the character’s psyche’s, Ratner takes on another approach and goes the full-on action route. And in these fan-boy’s eyes, nothing wrong with that at all. The two prior flicks gave us ample character development - and did it magnificently. Time for some good-old-fashion brouhaha and X3 delivers this in spades! The final battle between the ‘Brotherhood of Evil Mutants’ and the X-Men is a real doozy! I enjoyed ‘The Last Stand’ not as much as the first two, but certainly not a disastrous movie as some have suggested. Oh and do stay beyond the final credits, there’s a scene waiting for you that easily suggests that we have not seen the last of our mutant heroes.

The Da Vinci Code

It was a little disconcerting heading into the local cinemaplex to see the controversial ‘The Da Vinci Code’. Many of the reviews have been incredibly one-sided and the reports that eminated from its debut showing at Cannes last week were not favourable at all. But far be it for me to be influenced by what others say, I wanted to see this one for myself and I wanted to make my own mind up. And you know what, I’m sure glad I did because I found ‘The Da Vinci Code’ to be a damn fine movie and one that had me absolutely rivetted from beginning to end. Quite a feat, ‘Da Vinci’ is close to two and a half hours long but I loved every single (plausible) second of it. Those with hidden (and not so hidden) agendas will pan and criticize this movie to no end, go see it for yourself, and like me, make your own mind up. Two thumbs up and a bunch of ‘Hail Mary’s’ thrown in for good measure.

The Hills Have Eyes

From the outset, I have never seen the original Wes Craven version of this flick. (Yeah I know, horror-movie blasphemy and all that), so I entered the cinema with an open mind and not holding my breath that a remake would tickle my fancy. Look, there’s nothing on offer here that you have never seen before. It’s pretty much by-the-numbers standard horror-movie-fare. Family gets lost in the dessert, family get picked off one by one by zombie-like nuclear fallout mutants, remaining family members regroup and get revenge on said zombie-like mutants - and on it goes. But having said all that, ‘The Hills Have Eyes’ is both stylish and slick in its execution and if you’re a fan of ‘Hostel’ and/or ‘Wolf Creek’ - I really can’t see why you wouldn’t enjoy this splatter-fest either. Predictable, but fun nonetheless.

V For Vendetta

My three fave comic books/graphic novels of all time are ‘The Dark Knight Returns’, ‘Watchmen’ and ‘V For Vendetta’. They are books which have remained in the sinews of my brain long after I first read them in the late ’80’s & early ’90’s. Although the film version lacks the greater depth and exploration that the graphic novel has, I still found it a more than worthy adaption by the Wachowski Brothers. Inevitably, there are certain differences between the book and the film, and controversially author Alan Moore requested his name be removed from the movie credits. The movie features outstanding performances by Hugo Weaving in the lead role and Natalie Portman as his protege Evey. Beautifully shot and with a moody and visceral atmosphere, the movie unravels itself to an inevitable conclusion. If you’ve never read the comic, you will adore this film, but for the die-hards there may be some disappointment directed towards the Wachowski’s changes and altered ending.

Inside Man

I’ve never been a fan of Spike Lee movies but I must confess, I really enjoyed ‘Inside Man’. It was refreshing to see Spike tackle a movie with no bloated social commentary or political messages. Featuring an accomplished cast (Clive Owen, Jodie Foster, Christopher Plummer & Denzel Washington - reprising his role as ‘Denzel Washington’. He seems to play the same role in every movie he does, but we won’t hold that against this flick). ‘Inside Man’ is a bank-heist movie - not quite the class or league of ‘Dog Day Afternoon’ but a somewhat ‘different’ bank-heist nonetheless. I absolutely adored seeing the streets of New York City from various angles and cinematography I’ve never seen in a NYC flick before. With Spike Lee’s great love for this city, he takes the viewer right down to street-level where you can see this mecca of cosmopolitan life from a very different take. A very entertaining movie experience, scattered with some genuinely light and funny moments throughout. I would have like a more climactic conclusion, but this is a movie I would recommend.

Syriana

Rita and I tossed the coin tonight… heads ‘History of Violence’, tails ‘Syriana’. I won with tails and ‘Syriana’ was it. I’m glad the coin favored me because this was indeed an eye-opening, thought-provoking movie. Very bleak in places due to the scary and frightening reality it shoves in the face of the viewer. Many times throughout I felt my fists clenching and anger rising at the stooges who manipulate the farcical ‘free’ world we live in - where the true evil in this world, clothes itself in a convoluted good guy pose. It is a complicated piece of film that intertwines itself within the world of terrorism (from all sides), sabotage, greed, money, power and ultimately - corruption. An amazing performance by Clooney and an a-grade cast to back him up.

Hostel

Been waiting a long time to see this one and boy, was it worth the wait or what? Sickeningly violent, gruesome, brutal, bloody and so damn sexy (in a Euro kinda way!), Hostel (literally) takes no prisoners! I absolutely loved the visuals and cinematography in the torturous, damp, blood-splattered killing dungeons. Hostel is completely mercilless in its execution (pardon the pun) and will leave most of the audience either covering their eyes or cheering on the protagonist’s ultimate finality. There was a mixture of both happening at the showing tonight - my girlfriend whincing and twitching in her seat at every gory moment (and there’s a few) and your’s truly letting out giggles at the intense mayhem on screen. Fuckn lovvvvvved it!

Transamerica

Rita and I had won double-passes to see an advance screening of Transamerica this weekend. The movie doesn’t officially begin in Australia until March 2. Whilst this is certainly not a movie I would go and see in normal circumstances, I am glad we got to see it as it was indeed, entertaining and a great movie at the same time. Some genuinely funny moments throughout, Transamerica is a road-movie unlike any you’ve ever seen before. The performance by Felicity Huffman is near faultless. Playing the role of a man wanting to be a woman and playing that role so convincingly is quite an achievement. Transamerica is unique in every way and gets the Dogmatic seal of approval. Do check it out.

Brokeback Mountain

An incredibly powerful, gripping and emotive movie reflecting the lives of two men living in love and in secret from a world that is quick to hypocritically judge them. It’s refreshing to see a movie like ‘Brokeback Mountain’ breakthrough in the religious infested world which is trying to permeate our every thought whether we like it or not. Go see this movie and support every human’s right to be who they want to be without fear and loathing.

Walk The Line

I’ve often been described as the Man In Black myself for my penchant for all things… black. But the one and only Man In Black has always been and always will be… the legend that is Johnny Cash. I’ve waited months to see this movie and was treated to an advance screening today. This is an amazing movie experience and hopefully will even introduce a whole new generation to the first true rebel of modern day music… Johnny Cash. Starring Joaquin Phoenix in the lead role, he pulls off a rivetting and very believable performance. Must see film folks!

Underworld: Evolution

I really enjoyed the first Underworld and was looking forward to the sequel. Any movie that features Kate Beckinsale in Matrix-style black leather and spandex - I’m so there! Halfway through Evolution and I found myself looking for the EXIT signs rather than Kate’s deliscious derriere! Pretentious. Boring. Seen-it-all-before standard fare. Save yourself the time folks and watch Blade 2 instead. Crapfest of the highest order.